But when you ask Him be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind.
James 1:6
I have a confession to make. There is a circumstance in my life that over the last year I have been praying for. As my walk with God has progressed and my dependence on Him has grown there is nothing that I doubt is possible for God to handle. I have seen Him do some pretty amazing things and I have come to trust Him more and more with every passing day. I take praying seriously. I understand the great power of the Holy Spirit who will take my prayers directly to the Father and intercede on my behalf. I trust that when I am asking God for something and it is aligned with His will He will answer it (1 John 5:14-15).
I pray for my foster child on a regular basis and I pray for her parents, although not nearly as often as I should. When I pray for her parents I ask that they be delivered from their bondage to a life filled with poor decisions. I ask that God draw them near to Him and that they would begin a relationship with HIm. I pray that they would learn to know God and understand Whose they are and find a deeper love for their children and themselves. Ultimately I pray that this family would be reunited. God must want the same for these two so I know that it is prayer worth honoring. My problem with this prayer isn’t in my unbelief when I am sitting in my quiet room talking one on one with God. My problem is in the way I speak or think about them throughout my day. When an issue arises, when my foster child is missing a parent or sibling, when I think of the lack of emotion they display or the few letters she received over the last 15 months.....these are the moments that I tend to doubt. I catch myself talking negative, giving them no hope for getting their lives turned around.
As His word points out, in the book of James, listed above. If I ask for one thing but doubt shows through my thoughts and discussions with others then I am like a wave tossed by the sea. One moment, when things are looking promising.....when I am closest to God without the distractions of life beating on my door, I can have faith. But the moment my day gets moving or an issue arises I can all to easily get drawn into negativity. Me and my prayer get tossed around and sadly my prayer will never reach God when it is getting tossed back and forth all over the place. When God hears me speak negative He sees me wavering in my faith in Him! When he listens in on my conversation with my best friend over the little chance that my foster mother has in getting her kids back I am ultimately saying to God that I don’t believe He is capable of answering my prayer. That thought concerns me......the thought of me telling God I don’t believe in His ability saddens me.
Dear God, I don’t want to be like a wave tossed in the sea! I want my prayers to have a direct line to You. No more of this back and forth thinking! Please forgive me for how I have doubted you. Point out our negative thoughts so that we can remove them from our day. Teach us how to uphold our positive thoughts and our unwavering faith in You. You hear our prayers and You long to answer them but only when our hearts are pure and our faith is consistent. Thank you God for speaking to me and making me aware of this fault in my life. Lead me to a new understanding of You. Lead us to calm waters where our faith never waivers. In Jesus’ name I pray......Amen
Call it being over optimistic but I believe that is what an unwavering faith life looks like. We should be crazy positive in our life when God is at the center. He is all knowing, all powerful and He is on our side......how could anything end wrong. Go wrong?......yes things will seem to go wrong and satan will use those moments to beat us down but with God it can never end wrong. He knows what's best for us and we can trust that the outcome to any situation is the right one! So during those moments when things look all wrong keep that positive attitude. Quote scripture that claims the promises He has for you! Find a friend who will keep you focused on positive thoughts. Ask God to help you in your wavering. Whatever you do don't speak negative to your situation. Stay on calm waters!
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